


Wherever I Roam (You’ll Always Be Home)

by stardustedruins



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru Angst, Japanese Men’s National Volleyball Team (Haikyuu!!), Jealous Oikawa Tooru, M/M, Minor Hanamaki Takahiro/Matsukawa Issei, POV Oikawa Tooru, Pining Oikawa Tooru, Pro Volleyball Player Hinata Shouyou, Pro Volleyball Player Kageyama Tobio, Pro Volleyball Player Oikawa Tooru, Pro Volleyball Player Ushijima Wakatoshi, iwaoi - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:28:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,238
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27351970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stardustedruins/pseuds/stardustedruins
Summary: “Well if it isn’t Oikawa Tooru, the boy who never went to Nationals.” Atsumu says, the moment Iwaizumi is out of earshot.Oikawa’s eyes colour dark briefly— well two could play the game. “And if it isn’t Miya Atsumu, the lesser twin.” he watches with satisfaction as Atsumu’s eyes twitch in anger.In which Oikawa visits Iwaizumi for the first time in five years after moving to Argentina and consequently realizes that a certain other setter may have taken his place in Iwaizumi's life.
Relationships: Iwaizumi Hajime & Miya Atsumu, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru
Comments: 18
Kudos: 363





	Wherever I Roam (You’ll Always Be Home)

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! It's been such a long time since I posted something on ao3 because university has been kicking my ass. But I'm back with an IwaOi fic. Specifically presenting to you, a very jealous Oikawa fic. 
> 
> I love the idea of putting Oikawa and Atsumu in a room together, because they're so similar in attitude and their childishness. I would buy the hell out a manga for that. But most recently we did get an official art with both of them making faces at each other and that only fueled my imagination further. So here we are.
> 
> I hope you guys like this story, because I worked super hard on it and actually like the way it turned out! Thanks for reading!

* * *

In hindsight, Oikawa should have given more thought to the idea of flying halfway across the world to surprise his best friend. The best friend he’s _hopelessly_ in love with, the best friend he hasn’t kept in touch with all that well. Although, _in his defense_ , his heart was the traitor here.

It’s in April that he receives the call— three months in advance of Iwaizumi’s birthday. For once, Oikawa had returned back to his apartment early, instead of staying back at the gym. He lies in bed for a few minutes, staring at the cheap star stickers glued to the ceiling - most of them peeling off and colour half faded. A subtle reminder that he had overstayed his visit.

_He had been fresh out of school when he’d arrived in Argentina with Jose Blanco as his coach. The ocean, glittering under the warmth of the sun, sun kissed girls and exotic wines, Spanish sounding like poetry - an entirely different world had opened up before him._

_That evening, he had laid in the guest room of Blanco’s house, laptop on his lap, as he stared at the grainy feed of Iwaizumi on the other side of the screen._

_“Iwa-chan, it’s so different here. It’s nothing like Japan.” Oikawa had whispered, like a secret meant only for the moon and Iwaizumi._

_Iwaizumi rolls his eyes, lips twitching in a smile. “Of course it’s different, dumbass; you’re on an entirely different continent.”_

_Oikawa’s response comes a second too late. “Yeah,” and it’s obvious that Iwaizumi knows that the wonder is gone, replaced by fear and homesickness._

_Oikawa licks his lips and then— “Do you think— ”_

_“No.” Iwaizumi cuts him off._

_“Mean, Iwa-chan. You didn’t even know what I was going to say.” Oikawa pouts._

_“You were going to ask me if Blanco would send you back to Japan if you didn’t prove your worth.” Iwaizumi replies, unfazed._

_Oikawa blinks before his lips curl into a smile. “Of course my Iwa-chan would know me so well.”_

_Iwaizumi sighs. “I didn’t put up with you my entire life for nothing.”_

_“Rude Iwa-chan. Rude.” Oikawa whines, his lips back in a pout._

_“Seriously, Oikawa, Blanco knows how talented you are; that’s why he made you the offer. Focus on improving day by day and don’t you dare overwork and collapse.” Iwaizumi stares at him, green eyes sharp and focused on Oikawa._

_  
_ _“Right, because no one will be there to drag me out of the gym. Yes, yes, we’ve talked about this already.” Oikawa waves Iwaizumi off lazily, eyes half lidded as he settles comfortably onto his pillow._

_Iwaizumi clicks his tongue, face morphing into an unimpressed expression. “Get some sleep Shittykawa, we’ll talk later.”_

_“Iwa-chan, don't leave me okay?” Oikawa yawns as his eyes begin to droop._

_“I never have and I never will. Stop worrying about stupid things.” he hears Iwazumi say, after which he falls asleep._

Time had slipped by since then, and now, he was fluent in Spanish, knew the streets like the back of his hand and was on his way to getting an Argentinian passport. It had taken a while getting used to people calling him by his first name, it had been reserved for special moments back in Japan.

_“Tooru.”_ **_Look at me_ ** _._

_“Tooru.”_ **_Stop it_ ** _._

_“Tooru.”_ **_You’ll be fine_ ** _._

He could barely remember how his name sounded in that gruff voice now. Between training, practice and adapting to new teammates and a new home, calls with Iwaizumi had steadily dropped over the years until they had dwindled down into mere ten minute calls about each other’s days - as artificial as talking about the weather. 

Every now and then, Oikawa would feel nauseous thinking about the chasm that had opened up between the both of them - far more greater than the distance between Buenos Aires and Tokyo. All those years of friendship fractured by the strain of a thinly stretched cable. Their younger selves would have been disappointed but, _at least they had tried_. 

On bad days, when Oikawa was sick of beaches and Argentinian wine, he would remember green orbs - hues of a forest, like spring was coming and he’d instantly reach out to his phone only to remember that Iwaizumi had better friends now and that he was doing fine without Oikawa. The first time it had happened was a week after Iwaizumi had moved into his dorm at Irvine. Oikawa had heard pieces of English echoing faintly and then Iwaizumi was saying he had to go, Oikawa had let him. 

He knew Iwaizumi had to make at least a few friends, but between university and student life coupled with the time zone difference, Iwaizumi barely had any time for him. His ability to read his best friend had been sharp even then and he could tell by the stilted silent pauses, the excuses of having to be somewhere else and the conversations Iwaizumi would have with someone next to him as he kept the phone an arm's length away that Iwaizumi was slipping through his fingers.

So he did the only rational thing there was— _he let Iwaizumi go_ . He called less often and kept the conversation to a minimum, surprised when Iwaizumi never protested. It was all the confirmation Oikawa needed to know, that he had made the right call and if he had felt like his heart had been ripped out of his chest, he ignored that and instead practiced on his serves. _In the end, maybe neither of them had been strong enough to weather through it_.

Oikawa knew he was partly to blame. After all, he had an annoying personality that no one could put up with, especially for as long as Iwaizumi had. He hears from his teammates that he apologizes in his sleep. His captain asks him about it, gentle and warm - _you can talk to us, we’re here for you_. He reminds Oikawa of Karasuno’s tough captain and later that night, in a drunken stupor he confesses to his teammates that he’s in love.

He doesn’t remember much about the moment, but he knows he broke down - the taste of salt on his lips that wasn’t because of the beach next to the bar they had been in. It’s bit of a blur, if he’s being honest, but he can recall the stunned look on the faces of his teammates, because wasn’t Oikawa always happy and flirtatious? _Full of peace signs and fake smiles and a shallow personality?_

He remembers the quiet echoes and the cracking of his voice. “ _I love him. I love him so much and I let him go because I had to_.”

They never talk about that night again and Oikawa is always cautious around alcohol after that, but the team’s dynamic changes. There’s teasing and jabbing of course, but behind that exterior Oikawa can hear them say _we’ve got your back Tooru, you’re our pride_ and he finally feels content.

Maybe it’s because he’s nostalgic because of the stupid stars on his ceiling or maybe he just misses Hajime, but before he can stop himself, the line is already ringing.

“Oikawa?” Iwaizumi says as he picks up, his voice has grown deeper and husky over the years, a sharp contrast to Oikawa’s still whiny tone.

“Hey Iwa-chan, am I bothering you?” Oikawa’s eyes silently trace the cracks on the walls.

“No. What’s up?”

Oikawa laughs lightly “Nothing much really. I got back early from the gym and just wanted to check in with you.”

**_When was the last time he had called Iwaizumi?_ **

He hears a loud _‘Is that Oikawa-san?’_ in the background and his lips tug up in a smile. “Tell chibi-chan I said hi.”

“Sure, just hold on a minute.” Iwaizumi says and then Oikawa hears a few whispers and some rustling, he sighs quietly. This had to be an all new record for the shortest phone call they had.

“Oikawa?” Iwaizumi’s voice comes again.

“Yeah Iwa-chan?” he asks cheerfully.

“Sorry, I’ve got to go, but I’ll call you back again alright?”

Oikawa says goodbye, the call cuts and then he’s left with the stars and silence. He buries his face into his hands and tries not to think about it too much. But over the years, it’s only gotten worse. If Oikawa had thought it was upsetting enough that Iwaizumi had chosen a bunch of strangers over him back in university, then he hadn’t been ready for when Iwaizumi had returned back to Japan and became the trainer for the Olympic team. 

Now, Iwaizumi constantly chose Kageyama and Ushijima over him. Seventeen year old him would have died of the shock, but twenty seven year old him was much better equipped to handle the blow- only emptiness encasing his heart. Hinata, he could forgive, _he understood_ , but it was Miya Atsumu he was truly bitter about it.

If he had thought Kageyama had been bad enough, Atsumu had wrecked everything Oikawa had built over the years to tatters. Not only was Miya Atsumu a prodigy, but his work ethic was as rigorous as Oikawa’s. It had taken a while for Oikawa to understand why he loathed Atsumu so much and then one day, it all suddenly clicked - his personality was just as childish and annoying as Oikawa’s, but he was confident and devoid of any of the insecurities Oikawa had - _a much better version of Oikawa_ . He’d learnt from every other sports magazine that Atsumu was the setter to look out for, a rising star and he’d almost felt bad for Kageyama, _almost_. 

The phone rings loudly and jolts Oikawa out of his reverie. His hands reach for the phone immediately, but his face falls just in the slightest when he sees that it’s Hinata and not Iwaizumi.

“Chibi-chan!” Oikawa greets in a sing-song voice.

“Oikawa-san, it’s been a while!” Hinata greets back enthusiastically and Oikawa’s lips involuntarily tug up in a smile.

“What’s up?”

“Sorry about Iwaizumi-san, we’re the ones who sent him away because we had to talk to you. Although, Atsumu-san has no idea and that just happened naturally.” Hinata rambles, voice lowering.

“What does this have to do with Miya Atsumu?” Oikawa closes his eyes as his gut clenches.

“Nothing, he’s just overworking himself again.” Hinata responds casually, but Oikawa sits up and he feels the urge to go back to the gym.

However before Oikawa can say anything, Hinata cuts to the chase “Oikawa-san do you think you’d be able to come to Japan in June?” Hinata pauses and then whispers, “For Iwaizumi-san’s birthday. It’ll be a great surprise!”

There’s a moment of silence before Oikawa laughs and he knows it sounds bitter and petty but he can’t help himself. “Chibi-chan I’m sure Iwaizumi doesn’t really care about whether I’m there or not. He’s been celebrating his birthday for years without me. Anyway, you’re all there and that’s more than enough.”

Hinata doesn’t respond immediately and Oikawa feels his heart sink— _so he’d made a valid point after all_. He feels his eyes prickle but wills himself to not cry over the phone to someone who’s on the rival team, someone who’s younger than him.

“Oikawa-san,” Hinata says quietly. “Iwaizumi-san talks about you all the time.”

Oikawa closes his eyes, tears silently slipping down his cheeks. In another life, Oikawa would have believed Hinata, but here, right now, Oikawa knows the truth, but he humors Hinata anyway. Because if there’s anything besides volleyball that Oikawa is good at, it’s wearing masks and facades like changing outfits.

“Of course he does, it’s an honour to be best friends with me.” Oikawa chuckles and he hopes it sounds hollow only to him.

“So would you come for your best friend’s birthday Oikawa-san?” Hinata asks again.

“I’ll think about it.” Oikawa responds, knowing fully well that he wouldn’t be going any way.

“Alright Oikawa-san! By the way, Kageyama says hello.” Just as Hinata finishes the sentence, Oikawa hears a distant “ _Hinata boke stop lying!_ ” and Oikawa shakes his head, lips twitching. Kageyama had beaten him even at love, confessing to Hinata a week after their first league match against each other. Hinata had been overjoyed when he’d called Oikawa to deliver the news. Oikawa had felt happy for the couple, but a feeling of yearning had stirred within his own chest. Couples were a reminder of Oikawa’s own cowardice. Oikawa says goodbye soon after and then cuts the call.

_‘Nothing, he’s just overworking himself again.’_

Of course if Miya Atsumu would listen to anyone, it would be Iwaizumi. After everything Oikawa had put Iwaizumi through, Iwaizumi had ended up getting a degree just for these kinds of situations. A bitter taste fills his mouth as he remembers the days when Iwaizumi would march into the school gym for him and _him alone_.

After that, Oikawa lays back on his bed and loses himself in memories and thoughts. Every time the phone buzzes next to him, he reaches out and he’s met with disappointment. Deep down, he knows that Iwaizumi will not call again and he drifts off to sleep, curled up on his side with silence for a companion.

A week later, Oikawa has moved on, busying himself with practice, some more practice and then some more. If his teammates notice his extra rigour, more so than usual, they choose not to comment. When Oikawa gets home, it’s close to midnight and he practically collapses on his bed. His body feels sluggish and he has a difficult time trying to win the war between food and sleep when his phone rings loudly and he nearly falls off his bed.

“Hello,” he calls out groggily without checking the caller ID.

“Were you asleep?” Oikawa hears Hanamaki’s rough voice.

“Yes,” Oikawa replies shortly.

“Sorry about that. But tomorrow’s a Saturday, so you can sleep in all you want.”

“Makki!” Oikawa whines and then falls back against the bed.

“You just got back from the gym didn’t you?” Hanamaki asks in an amused voice.

Oikawa sighs. “Are you going to scold me?”

“No, I learnt a long time ago that these matters are best left to someone else.” Hanamaki chuckles and suddenly Oikawa sits up, rubbing his eyes, jolting awake.

“This is about Iwaizumi’s birthday.” It comes out as a quiet statement rather than a question because Oikawa’s known Hanamaki and Matsukawa for long enough.

“I heard that you haven’t responded to the invite yet.” Hanamaki responds back with ease but Oikawa knows better. He can almost see Hanamaki’s calculating expression.

“Makki, all these years and I’ve never once—”

“ _How long are you going to keep running?_ ”

The question hangs in the air, rendering Oikawa speechless. He swallows, steadies his breathing and then responds into the receiver “For as long as I can.”

“Oikawa—”

“No Makki, you listen to me.” Oikawa says, voice rising to a yell. “It’s been years alright? _Years_. I can’t just show up to Japan and pretend like everything is okay.” Oikawa can’t tell whether it’s due to exhaustion or hunger or his loneliness, maybe all three of them, but he’s crying and unlike with Hinata, there’s no way he could fool Hanamaki.

He hears a long sigh and then Hanamaki speaks quietly. “You were best friends for years. You don’t have to confess, don’t have to tell him you love him, you just have to come back and see him once Oikawa. The years you knew each other for, are longer than the ones you’ve been apart. Aren’t all those years worth something? Doesn’t Iwaizumi deserve at least this much?”

Oikawa lets out a strangulated laugh. “He deserves more Makki, he always has. Have you seen him with Atsumu? I’ve known him for so many years and that smile Makki, that smile is something I’ve seen _ever so rarely_. He’s happier without me.”

“I wish to God that you were in Japan so I can kick you all the way back to Argentina. You’re such an idiot captain.” Hanamaki hisses at him.

“Well I regret telling you and Mattsun that I love Iwaizumi too.” Oikawa sniffles.

“Stop crying.” Hanamaki says and then quietly. “ _Please._ ”

“I’m tired Makki.” Oikawa responds blearly.

“You’re lonely, that’s why.” Hanamaki argues. “Just— just come home once and see everyone. At least visit your parents Oikawa, it’s been what - five years since you saw them?”

“Yeah.” Oikawa whispers and then— “Why can’t Mattsun be the one who calls me, he’s so much nicer.” Oikawa whines.

“That’s exactly why I’m calling.” Hanamaki replies.

“I’ll think about it.” Oikawa concedes.

“I’ll call you every three days until you do.” Hanamaki threatens him.

A pause and then Oikawa says, “Thanks Makki.”

“Well someone’s got to kick your ass into gear.” Hanamaki snorts.

Like he had warned, Hanamaki calls once in every three days and badgers Oikawa. Matsukawa joins in too until Oikawa has no choice but to say yes to the duo. By the end of the month, he has plane tickets booked to return back to Japan for a week-long stay and that’s how Oikawa finds himself standing here now, in front of the hotel room that has been rented out by the Japanese team to celebrate Iwaizumi’s birthday.

Oikawa takes a deep breath and then he knocks on the door. No immediate response comes and the wait is agonizing. He raises his hand again to knock but the door begins to open and his hand drops of it’s on accord. His stomach is in knots and his hands are sweaty. The door opens and Oikawa wears a megawatt smile until he sees - 

“Ushijima?”

_Of all the people that could open the door...Honestly?_

“Oikawa,” Ushijima nods and he’s smiling too. Oikawa has never seen Ushijima smile before in all the time they’ve known each other, he’s too stunned for a moment to say anything.

“We’ve been expecting you. Iwaizumi’s inside, so you can get ready to surprise him. How have you been? You look well.” Ushijima scans him from head to toe.

Oikawa clears his throat “I’m good, yeah, doing fine. You?”

“I’m doing good too.” Ushijima replies and then leads him inside.

Oikawa follows behind slowly, still processing the conversation they had been having while he clutches onto the bag in his hand - gifts for all them from Argentina and just as they reach the end of the hallway, he sees Iwaizumi surrounded by the rest of the Japanese team.

He doesn’t know what’s going on, but the team is lively, they’re laughing and Iwaizumi is listening to Hinata and Atsumu with a fond expression while the others join in teasingly about something. Kageyama is staring at Hinata and it’s an odd lovestruck expression on his face. Oikawa would have laughed at the expression except for the fact that he probably looked like that whenever he stares at Iwaizumi. Kageyama looks happy and it makes Oikawa’s chest ache. 

Iwaizumi is wearing _that_ smile which brings Oikawa to an abrupt halt, and he stops breathing momentarily. Iwaizumi looks happy, happier than Oikawa has ever seen him. Oikawa watches as Iwaizumi lightly flicks Atsumu’s forehead and his hand subconsciously touches his own forehead as he remembers all the times Iwaizumi had done that at him, and the smile Iwaizumi wears - a mixture of exasperation and tenderness, it had been reserved _only_ for him. Oikawa can count only a handful of times he’d seen Iwaizumi direct that expression to him. _So, this was the effect Miya Atsumu had on Iwaizumi Hajime._ He feels his stomach lurch like a knife twisting inside him.

Oikawa mentally curses Hanamaki and Matsukawa over and over again. He had been just fine running and _this is why_ , this is exactly why he hadn’t wanted to return back to Japan. Iwaizumi had long replaced him but he on the other hand was hopelessly in love like a schoolgirl. He thinks he still has a chance to escape now but just as he takes that decision, Hinata spots him and his eyes light up. Oikawa smiles back weakly, if anything, he had at least one person who was excited to see him.

Ushijima takes a seat next to Iwaizumi and then he and Hinata share a look. Oikawa prepares himself and he pulls back the megawatt smile he’d been wearing a few minutes ago. Oikawa watches as Hinata nudges Iwaizumi and then points at him. It happens slowly - green orbs catch his brown ones and Iwaizumi’s eyes widen, a look of absolute shock etching on his face.

Oikawa strikes a peace symbol just for extra measure as he hears his heart beating like a drum and the room falls silent.

“ _Oi-Oikawa?_ ”

“Hey Iwa-chan.” he says casually, a smile still in place. He watches as a frown appears on Atsumu’s face, but it disappears as quickly as it had come. Iwaizumi is still frozen in his seat and Oikawa is trying very hard to maintain his composure. At this point he can’t tell whether the look on Iwaizumi’s face is shock or horror and he wants to gut himself. There was a time he could read every shrug and eye roll - one look at Iwaizumi’s face and he could tell exactly what the older man was thinking. But they had been boys back then, _boys_ . _This was a mistake. Oh god, this was a terrible mistake._ Panic washes over him in waves and he’s trying to choose a rational course of action.

Suddenly he’s enveloped in a crushing hug and the bag drops onto the floor with a loud thud. Iwaizumi smells the same as he did all those years ago and Oikawa’s beginning to tear up as he wraps his arms around Iwaizumi and buries his face into Iwaizumi’s shoulder. If Oikawa had to rely on one thing, it should have been Iwaizumi’s constancy. There are a thousand things Oikawa wants to say to him, but he settles on saying “Hey Hajime, I’m home now.” and he feels the rumble before he hears Iwiazumi’s laughter echo around them - unabashed, pure laughter and a few tears slip past Oikawa’s cheeks as warmth seeps into his chest. _Home had always been where Iwaizumi was_.

Oikawa goes around meeting the entire team, trading introductions and giving them their presents - which are surprisingly accurate to their likes and Oikawa beams with pride. At one point Iwaizumi murmurs lowly “You’ve been studying up on everyone, haven’t you?”

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa smirks “You’re the rival team, did you expect me to go easy on you?” 

“Never.” Iwaizumi replies without missing a beat as he ruffles Oikawa’s hair and Oikawa smiles cheekily. 

“I like this new Iwa-chan who’s much nicer to me.”

“Don’t get used to it.” Iwaizumi warns him, but there’s no bite in his voice.

Then they finally arrive in front of Miya Atsumu and Oikawa’s lips curl into an ugly smirk to match Atsumu’s own expression.

“Oikawa Tooru, I’ve heard a lot of things about you,” Atsumu says as he shakes Oikawa’s hand tightly.

“Unfortunately, no one’s been talking about you. So I can’t say the same.” Oikawa replies back, gripping Atsumu’s hand back, as hard as he can.

“I didn’t say they were good things, pretty boy.” Atsumu sneers.

“ _Oh?_ You think I’m pretty?” Oikawa smiles, saccharin sweet.

Both of them get pulled apart as Iwaizumi steps into the middle and sighs, rubbing his face. “I knew this would happen. Knock it off, _both of you_.”

“Small talk, Iwa, small talk.” Atsumu responds back with ease and Oikawa’s eyes twitch.

_Iwa?_

And as if Atsumu had known the effect it would have on Oikawa, he turns and grins at Oikawa smugly. Oikawa grins back tightly as he grits his teeth and he hopes that God will forgive him for murder.

“Iwaizumi-san!” one of the team members call out. Iwaizumi pauses, stares at the two of them, eyes flickering back and forth between Oikawa and Atsumu. “ _Five minutes_ , just five minutes and I’ll be back. If you both don’t behave, I’ll kick both of you out.”

Atsumu mock salutes and Oikawa waves Iwaizumi off. “I’ll be minding my own business Iwa-chan.”

Iwaizumi raises an eyebrow at him that reads _‘when have you ever minded your own business’_ but he shakes his head and then walks away.

“Well if it isn’t Oikawa Tooru, the boy who never went to Nationals.” Atsumu says, the moment Iwaizumi is out of earshot.

Oikawa’s eyes colour dark briefly— _well two could play the game_. “And if it isn’t Miya Atsumu, the lesser twin.” he watches with satisfaction as Atsumu’s eyes twitch in anger.

“I look forward to playing against you.” Atsumu grins.

“I’ll crush you.” Oikawa spits out.

“It doesn’t matter if you win on court, you lose at life anyway.” Atsumu shrugs.

“Meaning?” Oikawa arches an eyebrow.

“At the end of the day, I’ll still have Iwa though.” Atsumu responds smugly.

_Oh that bastard._

“He hates the name Iwa you know, _only I get to call him that_.” Oikawa says venomously.

“He laughed the very first time I called him that, so I guess you’re wrong.” Atsumu says, pearly white teeth displaying a broad grin.

Oikawa grits his teeth. He’d been yelled at repeatedly for giving Iwaizumi that nickname until Iwaizumi didn’t have a choice anymore, and that really summed up their friendship. Oikawa dragged Iwaizumi into whatever he did without offering Iwaizumi a choice. He clenches his fists, eyes straying away to the green summer hysteria outside and he’s reminded once again why he can’t confess to Iwaizumi. Oikawa tries to put himself back together, aware of the fact that Atsumu is watching him, but twelve years of unrequited love chips away at his soul and he suddenly feels unbearably tired.

“Here’s your gift.” Oikawa mutters, handing it to Atsumu and turning towards the veranda before Atsumu can say a word. He sits down and watches the vibrant colours of the flowers blooming and then tilts his head back as he breathes in deeply. 

It’s a cool summer day and the taste of the air is vastly different from Argentina’s. Oikawa’s lips press into a thin line as he thinks about Argentina. A week, _that’s all he had_. How could he compete with Atsumu, or with anyone else for that matter? He imagines a future for Iwaizumi, one that he knows he cannot give. He wasn’t good enough for the Japanese team, he’d spend the rest of his career in Argentina - oceans and skies, blue and blue but no green and no Hajime.

Only if he’d confessed when he was sixteen- so young and full of hope. If Iwaizumi had rejected him, it would have been that much easier for Oikawa to let go of him.

He feels someone flick his forehead and his lips involuntarily tug upwards in a smile. “Iwa-chan.” he hums, opening his eyes to see Iwaizumi sit down next to him.

“What happened with Atsumu?” Iwaizumi asks.

“Nothing really.” Oikawa shrugs.

“Are you sure?” Iwaizumi stares at him, a light frown appearing and Oikawa chuckles “Iwa-chan I’m fine, stop frowning so much or you’ll get wrinkles.” _If only I could make him smile more._

“Stop thinking of stupid things then.” Iwaizumi retorts.

“What are you talking about?” Oikawa tilts his head, blinking at Iwaizumi innocently.

“You’re wearing that expression - the one you have when you’re thinking too much about something.” Iwaizumi responds, as he stares pointedly at Oikawa. _Am I wrong?_ his eyes seem to say. And Oikawa cannot begin to understand how dense Iwaizumi could be when Oikawa was an open book to him. 

“It’s nothing.” Oikawa repeats, shrugging and looking away.

Iwaizumi lets out a long sigh and then says “I bet you’re thinking of something like how you’re staying only for a week but you need to make up for five years worth of distance.”

Oikawa’s eyes widen as he stares at Iwaizumi, mouth opening and closing, fibbing like he was a fish thrown out of the water. 

Iwaizumi shrugs, lips twitching. “I’ve known you long enough Trashykawa.”

Oikawa’s own lips twitch in response. “Mean Iwa-chan.”

They sit in silence, only the whispers of the wind and the swaying of trees surrounding them, the voice of the Japanese team is distant and low. Oikawa knows Iwaizumi is waiting for him to speak, but he would endure, like he had for twelve years, like he had over four time zones, _he wouldn’t crumble now_.

“ _Tooru_.” Iwaizumi’s voice is soft and quiet. **_Stop being so strong dumbass._ **Oikawa chokes back a sob. He had missed hearing his name in that voice, how his name could mean so many things. He should have known, against Iwaizumi, he never stood a chance.

“Iwa-chan, what’s the point? I’ll leave in a week and we’ll go back to the way it was anyway.” Oikawa looks at everything but Iwaizumi, clenching his fists tightly.

“It won’t.” Iwaizumi responds.

“Why? Because we’ll try harder this time?” Oikawa scoffs. He knows it’s unfair, they both were to blame, but this is what Oikawa does. He will yell and fight with Iwaizumi - _petty_ , say things he doesn’t mean but it will make it easier for Iwaizumi to let go of him and he’ll walk away ignoring the void in his chest.

Iwaizumi catches Oikawa’s chin and turns his face towards Iwaizumi’s. “Because we’ve waited long enough, dumbass.”

Oikawa’s breath hitches but he barks out a broken laugh. “ _I let you go Hajime_.”

“I let you go first and then neither of us were strong enough to withstand it through a cable stretched across the oceans and continents.” Iwaizumi says as he wraps his hands over Oikawa’s.

“What do you mean you let me go first?” Oikawa frowns, trying not to focus on the feeling of Iwaizumi’s hands on his.

“I was holding you back.” Iwaizumi sighs. “You were on another continent Oikawa, you were training to make it to the Olympics and I was the anchor on your ship. If I hadn’t let you go, then you would have never reached your full potential.” Iwaizumi shrugs.

Oikawa jabs Iwaizumi straight in the shoulder. “Iwa-chan you idiot, you absolute idiot!” he yells, so loudly that everyone inside goes quiet.

“Since when have you ever held me back from anything?” Oikawa looks at him furiously “My entire life you’ve put up with my childish antics and theatrics, stopped me from doing stupid things. You were always there to take care of me, you looked out for me, you were always there for me even when I didn’t deserve you - I’ve never deserved you. _You make me stronger Hajime_ , I’ve always been stronger with you.” Oikawa breathes hard, face scrunched up in a mixture of exasperation and anger.

Iwaizumi blinks up at him, shock and astonishment etching across his face.

“I let you go because _you_ deserve better Iwa-chan.” Oikawa sighs.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Iwaizumi frowns at him.

Oikawa’s quiet for a moment and then he says in a low voice “You’re happy here, with the Japanese team - Ushijima, Kageyama, Hinata, Atsumu, all of them. I keep up with Volleyball Weekly and all the interviews and everything Iwa-chan, and you’re happier with them.”

The next thing Oikawa feels is a whack against his head “Iwa-chan that hurt!” he whines.

“You’re the idiot.” Iwaizumi responds, a flicker of annoyance passing through his face.

Oikawa pouts.

“This is about Atsumu.” Iwaizumi raises an eyebrow, but it’s a statement and not a question.

“Is not.” Oikawa argues back.

Iwaizumi continues to stare at him, unfazed.

“I’m not bothered by Miya Atsumu of all people.” Oikawa hisses lowly.

“Why not?” Iwaizumi asks casually, like it’s obvious Oikawa should be and it stops Oikawa in his tracks. He suddenly feels hot all over and he’s trying to pull away from Iwaizumi.

But Iwaizumi doesn’t let him “ _Tooru._ ”

“He’s childish, petty, arrogant, annoying, over-confident, a show-off— I could go on, okay Hajime?” Oikawa snaps and glares at Iwaizumi.

“Remind you of someone?” Iwaizumi’s trying not to smile as Oikawa continues to glare at him. “The first time I met him was after watching the team play a practice match and I knew right away that I must have done something terrible in my previous life because all you brats somehow end up stuck to me.”

“Rude.” Oikawa mutters weakly, but his interest is piqued and he listens attentively.

“The first thing he did was to give me a nickname and he called me Iwa without any hesitation - cocky and annoying.” Iwaizumi smiles, he’s thinking of the memory that Oikawa will never see and Oikawa’s stomach settles with heaviness, but Iwaizumi continues speaking “Except for the fact that it had been years since I let you go and I thought it was some twisted fate that I ended up meeting another setter just like you, going around calling me by that annoying nickname.”

“So you laughed because you were amused?” Oikawa asks, rather hesitantly.

Iwaizumi blinks at him for a moment before sighing “So Atsumu told you huh? But yeah, that’s why I laughed back then.”

Oikawa nods and then goes quiet.

“You know, on the surface, you both are very much alike. But your style of playing, as setters, as individuals, even the way your brains operate is very different actually.” Iwaizumi shrugs.

“Yeah, he’s better, I know.” Oikawa smiles sadly, trying to pull away again. This time, Iwaizumi lets him go and Oikawa’s heart shatters.

“You’d think so.” Iwaizumi says, when Oikawa looks up, there’s a hint of a smile on his face.

“Iwa-chan?” Oikawa tilts his head, confused.

“He overworks out of excitement you know. He comes up with a play or sees a play somewhere and suddenly he needs to perfect it overnight, just so he can try it out with the spikers and feel really cool about it.” Hajime’s eyes twinkle with amusement and then they turn soft and mellow “You overwork because you want to be the best, to be enough. You want to become stronger and stronger to the point where you love volleyball to self-destruction.”

“Jeez, thanks Iwa-chan.” Oikawa comments dryly.

“You’ve never loved volleyball more than you do right now, I see it. I know there are still days you stay back at the gym, but for the most part you’re taking care of yourself, you’ve grown up and _I’m proud of you Tooru_ .” Iwaizumi smiles at him fully now, _that smile_ \- eyes crinkling, green hues shining vividly, warm and unabashed and Oikawa’s breath hitches.

“Where’s my Iwa-chan?” Oikawa asks, stunned and then he gasps. “Are you an alien?” 

“Knock it off.” Iwaizumi hits Oikawa’s shoulder and then he shakes his head. “We’re both idiots.” Iwaizumi turns to face Oikawa as Oikawa wears a questioning expression.

“We’ve waited long enough.” Iwaizumi repeats again.

“For?” Oikawa continues to stare at him, eyebrows furrowed.

“ _I Iove you, dumbass_.” Iwaizumi murmurs quietly with fondness.

Oikawa blinks, expression unchanging and then as if a switch clicks inside of him, his heart rockets and his chest bursts. “ _What?_ ”

“Why do you look so surprised?” Iwaizumi arches an eyebrow.

“Iwa-chan you brute! I’ve been waiting twelve years for this moment and _you_ confess first?” Oikawa clicks his tongue, face aghast.

Iwaizumi shrugs “One of us had to do it and it didn’t seem like you were going to any time soon.”

“That wasn’t even a romantic confession, you insulted me while telling me that you love me. That isn’t fair Iwa-chan!” Oikawa whines and Iwaizumi lets out a sigh, muttering under his breath, something along the lines of _‘I wonder why it had to be you of all people.’_

And then Oikawa’s taken by surprise as Iwaizumi leans forwards and cups his face- hands warm and rough. For a minute, Oikawa is swimming in emerald green and then he feels Iwaizumi’s lips on his— gentle and slow and Oikawa melts against Iwaizumi— woody and pine and Oikawa knows he’s finally home.

When they pull away, Oikawa’s eyes are shining as he murmurs against Iwaizumi’s lips “I love you, Hajime.”

“I know.” Iwaizumi smiles as he brushes strands of Oikawa’s brown hair from his face and Oikawa’s cheeks heat up.

“Give me that hundred yen, Issei.”

Oikawa and Iwaizumi turn around to see Hanamaki and Matsukawa standing by the door. The former wears a victorious smirk and the latter looks amused.

“I’m not even mad at this point, Hiro.” Matsukawa raises an eyebrow at Oikawa. “But wow, you guys have been together in the same room for what, a few hours? _And you’re already kissing?_ ” Matsukawa laughs.

“Imagine if we left you both alone tonight.” Hanamaki wiggles his eyebrows “Get that birthday present, Iwaizumi.” He smirks.

Iwaizumi groans and buries his face into his hands.

Oikawa just stares at them and then he narrows his eyes “Did you both get me to come to Japan just to see who would win the bet?”

Hanamaki smiles innocently. “We have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“ _Makki!_ ” Oikawa screeches as he gets up to chase Hanamaki.

He can feel Iwaizumi’s eyes on him as he chases Hanamaki around, and he can’t keep the exhilarated smile off his face. Better they think his face is red from exhaustion and not from embarrassment. But Iwaizumi would know. Iwaizumi always knows. 

And he’d always know Iwaizumi the best.

*******

_The Japanese Team watches quietly from inside._

_“Are they always like this?” Atsumu blinks._

_“More or less.” Kageyama shrugs._

_“The kissing is new.” Ushijima comments._


End file.
